Consent Testing: When Your Dog Talks, Do You Know How to Listen?
Do you know what a "Consent Test" is?
If you've ever wished you could ask dog what they're really thinking, you’re going to want this simple tool in your arsenal of dog skills.
A Consent Test isn't so much a test as a communication skill. It's a way of pausing and listening, so you can hear what the dog in front of you is "saying."
This is what an engaged conversation looks like.
Who Should Use Consent Tests?
Consent Tests are for anyone and everyone who wants to have safe, mutually enjoyable interactions with dogs.
A Consent Test can be used when you are petting your own dog as a way to foster trust and mutual understanding, or with a dog you don't yet know well to ensure the interaction is safe, smooth, and mutually enjoyable. Consent Tests can be used during petting, play, and virtually any other type of recreational social interaction.
Note, that interactions such as necessary grooming or veterinary procedures do not fall under this umbrella of just-for-fun social interaction, and are not the appropriate setting for a Consent Test. This is because the purpose of a Consent Test is to tell you if the dog in front of you wants the interaction to continue. A dog who is receiving vaccine shots may not want their interaction with the vet to continue, but for their own good, they must be vaccinated. In the instance that we must do something to or with a dog that they do not like, the focus should be on making the experience as tolerable as possible for the dog, and as safe as possible for both dog and human.
In particular, make sure to use a Consent Test when you are not too familiar with this dog, or if they are shy.
Make extra sure to use this quick trick any time you interact with a dog who seem to have a short fuse. For example, if the dog displays a tendency to suddenly lose their patience and issue a snap or growl when you don't expect it, always take the time to perform a Consent Test.
How to Perform a Consent Test
Here are the steps to perform a Consent Test.
Sit on the floor, couch, or anywhere else you'd usually settle down and interact with this dog. Start by petting or playing with them as you normally would.
After no more than 15 seconds to start with, stop what you are doing. For example, if you were petting the dog, remove your hand from them and place it in your lap or rest it next to you.
Be still, calm, and neutral, and say nothing. Watch what the dog does next. How do you see them respond to this pause?
From here, you will proceed based on the dog's behavioral response. Let's think about taking one or two diverging paths.
Path One
If the dog does nothing, or moves or looks away, do NOT re-engage the play or petting.
Wait for around 30-45 seconds to see if they are just needing time to make up their mind. If they provide no indications that they want more of your attention, this dog is indifferent at best. Stop the activity completely for now.
Path Two
On the other hand if the dog:
Moves eagerly towards you or your hand
Paws or nudges your hand
Picks up and tries to present you with a toy you were using
Stares pleadingly at you, perhaps with a whine or cry like they're saying, "Why'd you stop?"
Or provides some other clear and obvious indication that they'd like to do more…
Then, congratulations! You have your dog's enthusiastic consent. Pet or play away!
Best practice is to perform a Consent Test with any dog you are interacting with at least every couple of minutes - even if you know them well. Like us, dogs have preferences that change with their current mood, and they'll appreciate little breaks to think about what they want right now.
If it helps, you can think of it like I do, as a conversation. In a conversation, one person should not be yelling every statement while the other only whispers. Nor should one person suck all the air out of the room with frequent, long monologues. In a good conversation, each conversant is mutually responsible for maintaining the back-and-forth rhythm that keeps the conversation interesting to both parties. If one conversational partner disrespected the needs of the other by waxing long and poetic about their favorite interest of making model trains, or tennis, or Dog Training, the other partner would rightfully begin looking for the closest conversational off-ramp.
Why Consent Testing?
Pausing intermittently to check in is actually natural behavior in canines. If you watch carefully, you may see dogs consent test each other during play. It's how dogs make sure they have everyone's buy-in when engaging in simulated danger, like play fights or high-speed chases.
There's another advantage to these check-ins. Imagine being on a rollercoaster, or playing a competitive sport. These are examples human-made fun that is enjoyable because of, and not in spite of, the feelings of risk or conflict they bring.
To understand this, we must consider that social play serves an important function: it lets animals, including dogs and humans, practice handling conflict and danger in a safe setting. Almost like a fire drill, but way more fun. For example, wolf pups practice fighting off predators through play, and so do their descendants, our dogs. These simulated survival scenarios builds skills and confidence for real-life danger.
But simulated danger can still feel, well… dangerous. When the nervous system is highly active, excitement can turn into overwhelm in a matter of seconds. And despite their absolute mastery of communication through body language, even skilled canine communicators can sometimes lose their connection in the shuffle of high-energy play. Missteps are common. A nip that’s too firm can turn a fun game nasty in seconds. Without regular check-ins, these small tensions can quickly escalate into real conflict. To complicate matters further, dogs, like young children, often struggle to recognize when they're getting overwhelmed. At a certain point, the nervous system can’t take anymore. Lashing out often follows, as the organism attempts to rapidly gain control of their environment and re-establish equilibrium.
And so, dog-kind has arrived at a simple and elegant means of co-regulation; the periodic, mutual pause.
Habitual brief pauses give every participant a moment to reset. These micro-breaks show mutual respect between playmates, open space for the dogs to observe and analyze each other’s body language, and allow the each dog’s nervous system to relax and re-balance. Crucially, it’s a moment for one dog to turn and walk away, should they need to. This way, everyone stays emotionally regulated and engaged by choice.
Pups have been passing this social skill down via social learning for generations, and now it’s your turn to learn! Once you master this non-verbal check-in, you will be able to tell your dog in their “native tongue” that you're ready to be a respectful, trustworthy playmate who will listen to their needs. What a beautiful gift for your best friend.
Final Thoughts
Consent Testing is for all dogs - shy dogs, bold dogs, irritable dogs, playful dogs…
At the conclusion of this piece, I find myself thinking especially about overly friendly dogs; you know the type. They love everyone, and everyone loves them. But, they’re at serious risk of knocking down grandma. That’s usually when I get a phone call from their owner.
Occasionally, my clients have noticed that their typically frantically social dog approaches interaction with me with uncharacteristic patience. There’s no magic instant transformation here; we are still looking at an excited dog. But in the vacuum of silent space once filled with the steady patter of, "Stop, Sit! That’s enough! Get down!” we often seen new behavior emerge in the pup. She slows down. You can see her thinking.
These moments can be hard to spot if you aren’t used to looking for them. In these situations, sometimes owners will feel inclined to conclude that their dog simply doesn’t respect them. Or, they may want to attribute the difference to some circumstantial factor: the trainer smells like another dog. The trainer is a new person, it’s just different. The trainer gave the the dog treats last time and she’s hoping to impress them enough to earn more… etc.
Upon observing such a display, owners will often ask the natural question, “How can I make her do that with me?”
We humans have a tendency to focus on action steps - “Give me something to do. I know I can make things change if you tell me what I need to do.” But when it comes to behaviors which originate from an over-taxed, over-active nervous system, the most effective response is often much simpler than we assume. A commanding approach, “Dominance”, or repeating our orders with more authority have little bearing on the issue in most cases, and will barely move the dial, if they have an effect at all. We are not going to improve an overstimulated pup’s performance by pumping more anxious human energy into the situation.
A surprising amount of the time, getting better behavior is about what we don’t do. It’s about the silent pauses we leave to let a dog think, and so that she can have her say.
Luckily, Consent Testing presents a species-appropriate, socially elegant method that even us clueless humans can understand. And it’s so easy!
It’s as easy as remembering to stop once in a while, so that both you and your dog can take a deep breath.
It doesn’t get much simpler than that.
“Good chat.”
